Funeral flowers vs. sympathy flowers
Funeral flowers go to the service: standing sprays, wreaths, casket pieces and large arrangements delivered to the funeral home or church before the visitation. They are usually sent by close family, employers and groups. Sympathy flowers go to the family's home, before or after the service, and are typically a vase arrangement, a basket or a plant. If you are not immediate family, a sympathy arrangement to the home is almost always the right choice.
Delivering to a New Jersey funeral home
Give the florist the funeral home's name and address, the name of the deceased, and the date and time of the first visitation. Florists deliver service pieces an hour or more before the visitation begins. Order at least a day ahead for standing sprays and wreaths; they take time to build and many florists need to source specific flowers. For a same-day service, call the florist's option for smaller sympathy pieces, which can be made quickly.
Religious and cultural considerations
Jewish funerals traditionally do not include flowers; a donation, a fruit basket or food for the shiva home is appropriate instead. Muslim funerals are simple and flowers are generally not part of the service, although sending flowers to the family home afterwards is common. Catholic and Protestant services in New Jersey welcome flowers at the funeral home and church. Hindu and Buddhist services often use white flowers and garlands; ask the family or the funeral director if unsure.
What to write on the card
Keep it short and sincere. "With deepest sympathy, the Rivera family." "Thinking of you and honoring Maria's memory." "Our hearts are with you. From everyone at the Broad Street office." Sign with full names so the family knows who sent it; funeral homes keep cards for the family to read later.
What to send
- Sympathy vase arrangement in whites and greens The classic choice for the family home.
- Peace lily or other green plant Lasts for years; often kept as a remembrance.
- Standing spray For the service; sent by family, close friends or employers.
- Fruit or gourmet basket Appropriate for shiva homes and families who ask for no flowers.
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Order Flowers NowFrequently asked questions
How soon should I send sympathy flowers?
Any time in the first two weeks is appropriate, and flowers that arrive after the funeral are often the most appreciated because the initial rush has passed.
Can I send funeral flowers the same day?
Small sympathy arrangements, yes, if you order early. Standing sprays, wreaths and casket pieces normally need a day's notice.
What if the obituary says "in lieu of flowers"?
Respect it: make the requested donation. A card or a plant to the home a few weeks later is still a kind gesture.
Where do I find the funeral home address?
The obituary lists it. Give the florist the funeral home name, the deceased's name and the visitation time.